Imagine two monkeys sitting in a fruit tree. One monkey looks at all the bananas, mangos, coconuts and oranges around them and says to the other monkey “it’s hard sticking to a diet when you are surrounded by temptation”. Now, I don’t know about you, but for me staying on a diet means making a decision every time I encounter some “forbidden fruit”. I have to decide, do I make a healthy choice or do I choose a rationalization?
But what about our relationships? We are surrounded by temptation all the time. At work, at a party, at the supermarket or even at the DMV. With every encounter we have to decide, do I make a healthy choice for my relationship or do I choose a rationalization and nibble on some forbidden fruit?
While we use food for a variety of emotional reasons when it comes to your relationship if you are tempted often or if you are feeding off of the attention of others you may ask yourself if your relationship is as healthy as it appears. It may be lacking in some essential areas. If so, be honest. Be honest with yourself. Be honest with your partner. Talk to your partner. Now. An uncomfortable conversation with your partner now may prevent a lot of pain later. Healthy choices are not easy but rewarding in the long run.
Ladd Sullivan M.A. LMFT LACouplesCounselor.com Helping Couples Heal